A man wearing a large ankh and a subdued expression sits at the desk playing solitaire.
He jumps up. "Oh! A visitor! Welcome to Fort Remote!"
"I'm the, well..., um..., I sort of give orders here. It's not like there are many to give, but when they come up, I give them! Things get rather tedious, I'm afraid."
0
orders
0
"Open the gates. Close the gates. Stop bickering. Let's have dinner. That sort of thing."
0
tedious
0
"Yes. This fort was built before the big wars with the sliths and nephilim. We were afraid of attacks from the tunnels to the west. But hardly anything lives in there, and the things that do really don't do much, so we have nothing to guard against!"
"To stave off madness, we busy ourselves with other activities."
0
activ
0
"Well, I play solitaire." He waves at the desk. "I've played thousands of games. Won two. Pointless, really. Then, we all take part in the standard pointless love affairs, have meals, exercise, have sing-alongs... Well, you get the idea."
"And, we act hospitable to the occasional visitor. Breaks the monotony."
0
visitor
0
"A party of adventurers came through a few months back! They stayed with us a week. Much fun was had. Then they went west, and most of them got killed. Chasm Drake. Then there are merchants, messengers, supply caravans, and so on."
0
drake
0
"Fearsome. Deadly. Wealthy. Remote. It doesn't bother us. We don't bother it."
1
stnd
0
You meet a petite, oddly pretty woman with long brown hair.
She nods, and looks you over. "I'm Belinda."
"I'm the chef."
1
chef
0
"Well, cook really."
1
cook
0
"That's what I do! Would you like a taste?"
1
taste
0
She runs and gets you bowls of stew. It's delicious. She flutters her eyelashes at all of you. "I put extra effort into my cooking. Helps relieve everyone's tedium."
1
tedium
0
"Nothing has ever attacked Fort Remote. Nothing ever will. But we keep busy. I have my own hobby."
1
hobby
0
She grins evilly. "Just say my name to Mick. He'll be out west. Get his reaction. That's what my hobby is."
2
stnd
0
A woman in steel plate huddles in the corner. She has a huge sword, and an even bigger hangover.
She moans and grabs her head. "Speak quietly please. I'm Bronwen."
"I'm the commanding officer out here in the back end of nowhere." She delicately sips some water from a bowl.
2
nowhere
0
"That's where we are. I could have been at the front, dealing death to sliths and doing some good. But here I am. At good old Fort Irrelevant."
2
irrelevant
0
"That's what we are. What I am. The only thing that could possibly attack us is the Drake. And it keeps to itself."
2
drake
0
"Mick claims he saw it. Ask him about it. As for me, I'm waiting to recover so I can resume my drinking."
2
drinking
0
"It's a dirty habit. But it keeps me from getting too angry. I'll get transferred someday!"
3
stnd
0
You find a small, handsome man sitting and contemplating this small spring. He's eating a sandwich.
"I'm Mick."
"Watching the spring. That's how I pass the time."
3
spring
0
"Pretty, isn't it."
3
belinda
0
The moment you say her name, he chokes on his sandwich, smiles ecstatically, rolls his eyes, breathes heavily, and gets a headache. Simultaneously. There are no words in his response, but he communicates an awful lot.
3
drake
0
"I saw it! I did! It wanders the tunnels occasionally, and it came close. I was sitting here, and it saw me, and I saw it! I thought it was going to kill me, but it lost interest. Not hungry, I think. But it could have ate me, in a second!"
"It's huge! I hope I never see it again."
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
26
stnd
0
3
gnrc
0
He looks like he wishes you'd go away.
2
gnrc
0
"Oh, leave me alone."
1
gnrc
0
She flutters her eyelashes. "I'm sorry."
0
gnrc
0
He fiddles with his cards. "I don't know."
25
stnd
0
A heavily armored guard leans against the wall, snoring. Because of the helm, you can't tell if the guard is male or female.
"Zzzzzzzzzz..."
The guard doesn't respond. You decide not to push the issue.